EURO 2004 TV COVERAGE

Last updated : 05 July 2004 By editor

Kelner belittles the excuses for England's failures on the field that have been churned out by the media and its pundits and pinpoints an excuse for the crap TV coverage too.

'As with the England team on the field we have been fortunate enough to identify a scapegoat. The villain of the piece, the Urs Meier of the TV world, has undoubtedly been "the host broadcaster", the subject of much opprobrium after a semi-final in which Maniche's stunning goal was missed in favour of a replay of an earlier incident.

Gary Lineker was at pains to point out that "the BBC is not responsible for these pictures", from which point on Motty felt liberated to stick the knife into the HB at every opportunity. "Bit too much excitement there for our host broadcaster," he chuckled when yet another replay was fluffed.

As with Sol Campbell's disallowed header, they would not let it lie. On John Inverdale's programme, In The Know, on Saturday morning they replayed the fluff, alongside other great moments missed by TV.

"That is completely out of order," stormed guest Tony Wilson, founder of Factory Records and all-round UberManc. "Iberian football coverage is so much better than we have in England. There is real drama in it. They use short slo-mos and repeat close-ups of emotional facial movements. You haven't moved on. You're still covering football like you did in the 60s."

As befits a man with his CV, Wilson recommended the BBC use the recapture of Premiership highlights to introduce a New Order, a motion I feel will be seconded by many of you, and also one that suggests Sir Des may have chosen just the right moment to move on.'