THANK F*CK FOR THAT

Last updated : 31 August 2006 By Editor

Marina Hyde from the Guardian:

Deadlines, it hardly needs a journalist to suggest, are not generally anticipated with eagerness. And yet I cannot recall a cut-off point to which I have looked forward to as much as the stroke of midnight tonight, when the transfer window will shut, with any luck crushing in its steel-framed embrace the fingers of a few players, agents and managers whose vocabulary does not stretch to understanding the word "contract".

Perhaps it is the fact that many people are still jaded and disillusioned by the national team's performance in the World Cup. Perhaps it is the creeping sense of distaste at the manner in which much footballing business is conducted. Perhaps it is simply the image of Ashley Cole grinning from the cover of OK! Magazine's July tribute to his "million pound wedding".

But I have not found the historical period dating from May 8 2006 to August 31 2006 particularly life affirming.

It's not just the Ashley Cole saga, which may very well be some kind of alien plot to gauge the mental resilience of earthling football fans, and to which we might return later if we can summon the strength.

It's the scattergun use of the alleged word "wantaway". It's Michael Carrick being competitively priced at almost £19m. It's being asked to take an etiquette lesson from Middlesbrough's Keith Lamb, who 10 minutes ago was flouting Premier League rules to appoint Gareth Southgate as manager.

This close season's chief canker, of course, has been the stand-off between two powers over Ashley Cole which has produced slightly more coverage than the Cuban missile crisis, and whose sole positive outcome has been keeping the England left-back's self-regarding book off the shelves until its resolution.

Still, as of midnight tonight, it's farewell to all that. Farewell, too, to the mental image of Harry Redknapp's homemade Fratton Park diorama, fashioned out of a shoebox, around which he manoeuvres cut-outs of Ayala, Pirlo and several players represented by Pini Zahavi in his very own theatre of pipe dreams. Agonising wrench that it will be, we may now keep at least half an eye on the football.